Once, there were two college students staying in the same housing society. They both were in class XII. But in different institutions. They both had working parents. One out of them was very flamboyant. Just like his parents who only believed in telling the world. How well they were doing and also, how well their child was doing in college. They had nursed big ambitions. That their child will qualify for the best professional college, from where no dream will be impossible.
The other student was rather subdued, again, like his parents. He used to spend a lot of time in understanding about the merit and sweat required to get into a professional course through competition vis-a-vis his own capabilities.
After clearing class XII exams. The subdued student took to the first professional course that he could qualify for and went his way. While, the flamboyant student decided to pursue higher and tougher ambitions based on his parent’s advice and his own overconfidence.
Some years had passed when the subdued student after completing his professional degree had taken up a job in a midsize company, while the flamboyant student along with his parents was still busy making lofty plans of conquering the world.
He kept trying for the best institutes. When, he couldn’t even get into the average ones. He became very selective on what he wanted to do. Without ever assessing his own capabilities. And a day came when he was neither in any professional college nor in a job, whereas the subdued student had completed half a decade of service and was now a manager in a big company.
Children are like books. Unless you read the book end-to-end. You will neither understand the narration, plot, nor the end of it. Many parents are very good at reading only the first chapter of their child’s book and that too again and again, and that alone satisfies them beyond compare. They do not take the trouble of reading their child’s book end-to-end. This creates a lot of dissonance between what a child can do and what he is told to do.
And mind you. The book on its own, will never come and tell you the narration, the plot and the end. On the contrary you will have to make an effort to read it.
To know your child, read the complete book. Read all the chapters. For that alone will give a very clear view of his liking, desires, aspirations and capabilities vis-a-vis available opportunities.
Remember: The book of your child is as interesting as any other best-seller you might be reading now. So let it, just not lie in your library. Pick it up and read it now. And I’m sure. Once you go through it you’ll feel like reading it again and again, and from time to time.
This is the gist of an article I had read sometime back. As far as possible we should try and remove the mismatch between our child’s capability and what we expect him to do, to make him happy.
Posted by Kamlesh Tripathi
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GLOOM BEHIND THE SMILE
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ONE TO TANGO … RIA’S ODYSSEY
(Archived in Connemara Library, Chennai and Delhi Public Library, GOI, Ministry of Culture)
AADAB LUCKNOW … FOND MEMORIES
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REFRACTIONS … FROM THE PRISM OF GOD
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Story of an Indian salesman who is lowly qualified but fights his ways through uncertainities to reach the top. A good read for all salesmen. Now available in Amazon.com
(CAN BE BOUGHT FROM ON LINE BOOK STORES OR WRITE TO US FOR COPIES)