LESSON FROM THE MAID
Hoosh—hoosh … bhaw—bhaw … hut—hut … shoo—shoo. I began poking, the off white cow, with a small twig from the inside of my gate. But it refused to budge, while, it was happily chewing the cud on a wet and a slushy day. She had appropriately grounded herself on the dry narrow isthmus that connected the very short distance between my gate and the road, blocking the entire passage. There is an old wives tale that says. Cows tend to lie down when it is about to rain. Researchers have even discovered, that cows stand up for longer durations when it is hot, proving there is a definite link between their behavior and the weather. They also suggest, cows lie down when the weather is cooler, which is, just before it rains.
When the hoosh–hoosh … shoo—shoo and the hut—hut didn’t work. I took the small side gate and went out. Close, to her. She was XL in size and was in a relaxing mood it appeared. I held her tail, and started shaking it, to and fro, vigorously, thinking it’ll get up. But it was in no frame of mind to acquiesce. I poked her in the tummy with the twig again but that too had no effect. Then I thought of catching her long ears. But she swayed her long horns towards me. So, I had to retreat out of scare.
I then decided to get inside, the way I had come out, through the small side gate. Meanwhile, my wife too, came out with the objective of closing the gate. Thinking, I must have left for my urgent appointment by now, and as usual, without closing the gate. But, she was rather surprised to find me standing there, trying to shoo the cow away. When, she too, joined me in the game of hut—hut. But I guess all that was on deaf years.
Since, the cow was glued to the ground next to the main gate. We now decided to push the gate on her slowly, thinking she might get up with the pressure, but I guess the force wasn’t enough. I then decided to honk, thinking she is a road creature and might understand the language better. But that too was of no consequence. I looked up. It wasn’t going to rain. Then why was she sitting for so long I wondered.
In all of this about fifteen minutes must have passed. So, I called the person I was about to see, and told him I’ll be late because of the road blockage. We were running out of options now. I switched on the music of the car aloud thinking this too might spoil her peace forcing her to move. But that also did not work.
We again decided to push the gate on her but it made no difference. By now about twenty minutes had passed and I was really getting late when I saw my old maid coming with a mug filled with water. She was perhaps watching our ordeal for some time now. And when she was close to the cow she threw the water on her. I gave her a arrogant … questioning look, ‘what are you up to?’ but when I turned around I saw the cow was beginning to stand up. And in a jiffy she started moving and soon she was gone.
I looked back at the maid. She had a smirk on her face when she said, ‘bhaiya ji guy pani se darti hai’ (Sir! cow is scared of water) which a super intelligent person like me didn’t know.
I quickly opened the gate and cranked the car. I put it in reverse gear and it started rolling. Is when, my wife looked at me to acknowledge the very fact that fools don’t have horns on their head. We could only laugh at ourselves.
We all consider ourselves to be wizards one way or the other. But there is so much in life we still don’t know about, or at least I didn’t know … like cows drink water but are scared of pani.
By Kamlesh Tripathi
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